Most men think they’re confident… until life throws a curveball.

A breakup. A failed job interview. A moment of rejection or hesitation—and suddenly that “confidence” disappears.

That’s because most confidence is built on performance—not presence. And unless you’ve done the work to build it from the inside out, it will crack when pressure hits.

In this post, we’re diving into 5 signs you’re not as confident as you think—plus what to do about it.

1. You Constantly Seek Validation

Whether it’s likes, approval, or needing someone else to tell you you’re doing well—this is a clear sign your self-worth is outsourced.

Fix it: Start validating yourself. Do hard things. Keep promises to yourself. Practice sovereignty.

2. You Overthink Every Decision

If you’re constantly second-guessing yourself, confidence isn’t present—control is.

Fix it: Learn to trust your gut. Confidence grows with action, not more information.

3. You Struggle to Say What You Really Feel

Do you avoid conflict? Shrink in conversations? Say “it’s fine” when it’s not?

Fix it: Practice direct, honest communication. Confidence isn’t loud—it’s clear.

4. You Can’t Handle Criticism Without Shutting Down

When feedback feels like a personal attack, it usually means your self-image is fragile.

Fix it: Learn to see feedback as fuel, not failure.

5. You Perform Instead of Show Up

Trying to be “the cool guy,” “the funny one,” or “the alpha” isn’t confidence—it’s a mask.

Fix it: Strip away the act. Real confidence is quiet, grounded, embodied.

Final Word:

You don’t need to fake it. You don’t need to hustle your way into self-worth.

You just need to do the inner work. Reconnect with your power. And start showing up as the man you know you can be.